My Resolution

I was reading 2 Peter tonight for no specific reason when I came across exactly what I want this new year to be about. Here is what I read:

...make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. (NIV 2 Peter 1: 5-8)


The sequence that God listed explains a lot of things in my life. I lack knowledge in many areas which I think explains why I struggle with self-control, perseverance and godliness. I needed these verses tonight. God knew I needed them. I have been relying too much on other sources to get my information about God. I'm asking everyone but God what the answers are to questions I have. I've not settled on a church because I don't know what doctrine is best. I listen to countless preachers which I'm not knocking because I've always believed I can learn from preachers of all denominations. The point is, I should be putting the focus on what I learn from my personal relationship with God, with what He reveals to me through spending time reading His Word. I guess I've lost faith that God will reveal things to me. I've started relying on other people too much and not relying on God as much as I should. It took reading those verses to make me realize how weak my faith is sometimes. I am ashamed to admit that. Having said that, I still think it's important to seek the wisdom of Godly people. I can't count the number of times I've asked my dad or mom things, and was really blessed with a better understanding.

I'm ready to print those verses in 2 Peter and put them on my refrigerator. I haven't done that in a while. I need to be reminded daily. As many times as I go to the fridge, I'll be reminded MANY times a day!

Thoughts for today...

I feel like this blog has drifted away from what I originally planned for it to be about, but that's okay I guess. It's become more of a "random thoughts from Allison" blog. With the new year, I've gone back to my first few posts. I realize that I have not been as faithful to the steps I listed as I should be. Like I said before, I believe in being honest. I have let other things take priority. I was consumed in my school work last semester and my Bible actually collected dust. BIG MISTAKE! When will I ever learn? Well, this is what new beginnings are all about. I'm about to start another semester of school so I know what I'm up against. I am determined to make more time for God. I pray continuously and I always have, but I know I need to be reading and studying the Bible more. I need to be spending QUALITY time with God. I remember Joyce Meyer said one time (and this is great) - We all have calendars and schedules and we try to fit God in there somewhere. What we need to do is put him there first, and figure out where to put the other stuff! Of course, Joyce explained it MUCH better than me.

Home for Christmas

It's that time of year again. Christmas is so fun for me. I still have a hard time not buying too much. I worry that my kids are focusing too much on Santa and not Jesus. I wish there was a way to get them as excited about Jesus as they are about Santa. There are some similarities in Santa and Jesus I observed while watching "Miracle on 34th Street" today. When I was a little girl I always thought that was the real Santa. I have always pictured Jesus being a lot like that particular Santa. He was kind and it showed in his eyes. He understood each individual child's needs and desires. We don't know how he does all he does on December 24th, but we don't ask - we just believe. We don't how God does all He does, why things happen the way they do, what He has in store for us next...but we believe He is perfect and He is good. What are we without faith? Sometimes I hear people say "as long as you believe in something and it makes you happy, it's okay." How can you just believe in anything? Who ever said we had to be happy all of the time? There's a difference in being at peace and being happy. I'll take peace any day. When I think of my relationship with God, it's not some religion that I claim - it's a true faith in Him. God reveals himself daily to me. He is never far away, and I can feel it. His presence means everything to me. To me it's not hard at all to believe in Him. I know that I am nothing without Him. I don't even pretend I could make it on my own! I've tried that route before, and it doesn't work. When you know to Lord, when you've had a relationship with Him, if you start going your own way, it doesn't take long to get homesick. He is my home.

The Search

It's been a while since I've posted. The past month and a half my family and I have been visiting churches. It is amazing how many churches are around, and how different they are from each other! In a way, it's a disadvantage to visit too many churches. You start to get picky! I noticed that after the first couple of churches, I would say hmmm...I like this one but I don't know about being here for two services, plus group meetings. The next one I'd say, let's find a church that starts at 10:00 so that we get out earlier! The next one, we'd say hmmm, I wish there were more people our age. The list goes on and on. I've come to realize that thought it is almost possible to have a "custom made" church now, it's not wise to try to try to find the "perfect" church with the perfect people, the perfect service times, etc. Lately, we've been focusing on the doctrine, the belief in eternal salvation and the pastor first, then the overall feel of the church. Do we feel welcome? Are there ministries available for our kids? Is there a music ministry? These are important. What's not important is what the sanctuary looks like, what time we get out of church, etc. I think we've narrowed it down now to two churches. They are very similar in some ways, and different in others. We are going to attend these two for a little while and hopefully decide on one soon! Basically, what I am saying is not to be too picky about choosing a church. If you are, you may never settle on one. Besides, church is for God, not for us.

The Shack (con't)

Ok - I've had a couple of days to process everything. I do want to be clear about something. I do believe there is a lot of truth in this book, but that doesn't mean I agree with EVERYTHING. Many things do NOT line up with scripture, so I do see this book for what it is -a fiction book. What made me feel closer to God was seeing the relationship one can have with Him (or the Trinity). Also, the question "why do bad things happen?" was in some ways answered. The main character did not want to forgive the man who killed his daughter, but God says He must in order for God to redeem Him. The main character can't see the killer through the eyes of God. So, there are good parts and misleading parts to this book (In my opinion). I've read a lot of bad reviews from the Southern Baptist church, and I understand why. The Word of God is the Bible, not The Shack. I do trust, believe and will always stand by that. When I said many people put "God in a box," The box wasn't the Bible, but just so many people's perceptions are of Him. Sometimes I think we put limitations on God because we just don't understand just how loving and powerful He is. So, by no means am I saying that this book is the gospel. There is only one gospel. The whole conversation between Jesus and the main character about religion is interesting. I've always believed God was not interested in religion, only personal relationships with him. There is a difference though between "religion" and "church." I think there are some churches out there that are just "religious" but I also know there are whole lot out there that are not. There are a whole lot of churches out there that are all about serving others and worshipping the Lord, and everything a church should be according to the Bible. I think a lot of things can be perceived in different ways in the book. For instance, the "church" isn't always referring to a building where people go. It is also the believers in Christ as a whole. So, I'm no expert. The book did move me. It made me feel really loved by God. That can't be a bad thing. It's not some "Oprah" or "new age" book. The author and main character clearly love all parts of the Trinity - Jesus, The Father, and Holy Spirit. It is unique how he describes their relationship to us as well as to each other. I think one has to overlook some of the negatives of the book to really see the overall picture - which is God wants to be with us always, every second, every minute of every day. What more could we ask for?

By the way, I read some negative reviews about God being portrayed as a black woman. I don't think the author is saying God is a black woman. He made himself into the image a woman for the purpose of healing the main character. He even says he can take on the image of anyone or anything He wants. Besides, later the book he was in the image of a white man. I think it's obvious the author is not saying God is a woman.

Speechless...well, almost!

Well, I just the read the book, The Shack, and I must say, I have never been so touched and felt so close to God in all my life. Actually, I'm a little speechless right now (Ha! -that's a first!). No, really, something deep down in my soul knew that there is truth is this book. I know this book will be controversial because in so many ways it goes against what we as Christians have been taught about God and even church. We tend to put God in a box and say this is what God is and this is what we are supposed to do. I'm not going to comment on all that yet. I really need time to collect my thoughts. All I can say is I feel lighter since reading the Book. I feel like I've put too many expectations on myself. Somehow I felt like if I was not doing everything just right, I would not experience a good relationship with God. It really changes, in some ways, what it means to be a strong Christian. All the things I've talked about are important, are good, and are things I'll still strive to do, but I left out the most important thing - allowing God to not be a part of my life, or the biggest part of my life, but taking Him with me many in EVERY part of my life. What is a "strong" Christian anyway? Are any of us really strong compared to Him? The most well known song of all time "Jesus Loves Me" even says, "They are weak, but he is strong...". Being weak isn't always bad. Sometimes it makes us lean on our Rock, our Strength, our Refuge, our God.

Hmmm...I may rename this blog soon...maybe to "My Walk With God"

Just my opinion...

This is kind of off topic, but I just had to comment on how awful the MTV Music Video awards were last night. Why I watched? I don't know - curiousity I guess. That, and once in a while I hope to see a performer I like. I didn't even get through watching the whole show. The host was terrible. It's really embarraring what our music has become. I'm not saying all current music is bad, but a lot of it is. A lot of the music that the younger generation likes is so pathetic compared to what America had in the 60s, 70s, and even some the 80s. I sound just like my parents back in the 80s! Ha! We really do turn into our parents. I just have a REALLY hard time relating to this generation's idea of good music, to all the these no-talent reality celebrities, and most of all the pure lack of morals. Afterall, I would imagine mostly teens and young adults watch the show. All that aside, the show was just bad because it was not put together well. There were a lot goofs, the graphics behind the stage were annoying, even the audience didn't really look that into it. I have learned my lesson. I will not watch it next year. I'd rather watch Spongebob or Elmo. They are much more entertaining. Okay...now that I got that off my chest! I've got to get back to studying!!!! God Bless. By the way, we're still on a new church hunt, and I am SO ready to find a new church home.